Dear The Reader,
On Friday I was subject to an idiot who thought he could drive. First, he cut me off, almost causing an accident. I came very close to running into the back of his car. He later slammed his breaks on for no reason, at which I gave a friendly toot with my horn. He then attempted to reverse parallel park in a No Parking Zone. He reversed halfway in before stopping, blocking traffic, opened his door, looked at me and started yelling "What's your problem?!?" and other, more offensive phrases.
I decided to wait for the childish reaction to pass before replying. Here is my public reply:
I think you forgot to put your L plates on. Obviously you don't know road and parking rules, and I don't have time to teach you. Pick up some lessons from your local driving instructor.
If, by chance, you actually do have a full licence, I would be having a serious look at the corrupt RTA employees who wrongfully issued it.
In any case, you are a bit of a dickhead. The woman in the front seat didn't look impressed by your attempt at faux masculinity. If she was your partner, hopefully she saw your true side, and either left you or cut your bits off to match your validity of being called a man.
Please take into consideration other drivers next time you get behind the wheel.
Educate. Entertain. Inspire.
All I can say is, Amen, brother.
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